Being right is over-righted
“Be more dog” Unknown
Most of the stuff we do is reversible, not permanent. Most of the stuff that happens to us daily is out of our control, mere coincidences where we fool ourselves thinking of us as control agents.
- A client buys from us after our 20th call. We assume it’s our great resilience, persuasion and our strong speech on that latest call. Turns out they never wanted to buy themselves but that day, their boss mentioned our solution as a must and our client saw us as an opportunity to show off.
- Our spouse mistreats us at and we think it’s something we did wrong or a complex guilt scheme. Turns out they were just having bad day and at the same time they thought they were “teaching” us a lesson on who was “right”.
- Our project proposals at work get rejected by colleagues and superiors as they don’t buy into our vision. We think they are short-sighted, that the company will fail and that we just know better, whatever the outcome (and how dare they not believe). Turns out the owner meets up with some friends that open some doors and revenue multiplies soon without any changes needed.
The 80/20 of the river: Showing up
We are under the impression that we control most of what happens. Yet, the best we can do is to have intentions while certainly pushing for what we want (when possible).
Reality is an ever-changing river. Every time you step in it, it’s a different complex place. What’s important is to show up to swim.
- You push for your goals when the current is in your favour.
- You keep afloat when in a whirlpool and not waste energy.
- You certainly reap the benefits of catching a fish, even if it’s only because the fish couldn’t stand the river anymore and found peace in your hook.
It takes 20% of your effort to show up to swim, while 80% of the outcome is a mix of you showing up and what the current brings that day. You can choose to spend the other 80% of your effort to win the 20% being-right-lottery outcome (or not).
Tomorrow, please at least show up. A new river awaits.
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